What done so soon?
Its Valentines night, what are you doing reading blogs? heh heh, just a little bedroom humor there.
Well its confession time and for long time readers it will be quite humorous in the end. I ended up with an extra hour in my day and decided I would try to cook dinner tonight. Its not a capitulation on a Valentines gift, it was just linguine and canned sauce. But a big step for me nevertheless.
See for those of you who don't know, I can't cook. At all. I have burned down two kitchens and smoked out a few more. I cut off the tip of my finger a couple summers back trying to make dinner. My idea of high cuisine is eating my freeze dried camp meals I keep in stored in the garage and occassionally a bowl of soup. I live on sandwiches. Mistress has been kind to my 'disability' and I was recently promoted back into the kitchen for eggs and hash brown duty.
But tonight I thought what the heck, lets throw caution in the wind. I will make pasta.
Somehow...someway...I don't know how, I completely destroyed the plumbing under the sink and cruddy water and sink garbage exploded all over Mistress and I as we were investigating the clog. After the laughing at the movie-ness of it all, Mistress called the home warranty company to send out a plumber tomorrow.
I have once again been banned from the kitchen. I can go as far into it as the dog. At least I can reach the pantry. There's protein cookies in there!
posted by Comm's @ 7:07 PM
10 comments
10 Comments:
You know, Mountain House now has what they call their "Mountain Oven." Heat your freeze-dried Mountain House foods without even having to boil water!
Then again, there's always Clif Bars. Have you tried the Blueberry Crisp flavor? Good stuff.
Happy V-Day to you. It sounds like Mistress really loves you!
You really are talented! Thanks for the laugh this evening.
Ummm, if I may be so bold (lower case "b"), how exactly did "cook linguine" lead to plumbing under the sink?
You DID use a collander to strain that pasta, right?
are you sure you didn't do that on PURPOSE? :-)
I appreciate all the inflection I am reading here. I appreciate the humor.
But I must defend myself in all seriousness, perhaps as an object lesson for people like me. I never intentionally try to sabotage my cooking.
I do not know how to cook. I never have. I can boil water and heat up the contents of a can but as far as preparing and combining of ingredients, adding seasoning and paying attention to heating, I have yet to establish even a survivalable level for myself.
Mistress is in fact a tremendous and intuitive cook and baker. She enjoys it.
Did you have the home warranty when you burned down the two kitchens, or is that why you got it?
Mrs. Bigun and I recently went to "Dinner-Done" where they lay out all the ingredients and you prep the food, put them in serving-size containers and then freeze them. Best thing since sliced bread - turn on the oven and put the container in, set the timer and pull it out when the alarm goes off. Bamb - gourmet meal. These are franchises all over the country - worth the cost - actually cheaper than going to the grocery store. We got with 3 other couples and made a night of it - wine and cheese and crackers - it was fun...
Don't let these guys and gals give you flak. At least you tried! :) I have not made a meal myself in a LONG LONG time...
Comm's there are many worse places to be banned from than the kitchen! Seriously, though, it's great that your sense of humour wins out. Mistresses, too.
I have to just say, why cook when there are trained professionals on every corner who LIKE to do it? Even the grocery store has a ton of "bring home and reheat" meals. I applaud your efforts - seriously! But cooking just seems like a waste of time to me. I'd rather go for a bike ride or, even better... watch a little tv... ;-)
Post a Comment
<< Home