Is my spirit all wrong?
A bit of a non-sequiter from Boot Camp but I have been targeted by the Grinch it seems; either I am one or on the receiving end of one depending on the issue.
I believe in the spirit of giving. I truly believe that if you give you will receive back ten fold. I buy lunches for people, I buy gifts for people, I use unsolicited kindness. Just this month Mistress and I gave over 3,000 food items to a food drive. We sponsored an entire families Christmas with Christmas meals and gifts for their children and then bought gifts for another family's children. Not to mention all the other places our money goes to help others. We enjoy that and I feel a little embarrassed to mention it but it puts my rant in context.
In in my garage are several pieces of furniture Mistress replaced with the living room and family room furniture I bought her for Christmas. I called my pastor who runs the Dream Center and asked to donate it for one of the rooms. He gets his guy's to call me and they say it will be a week to get there so I take last Friday off work, then his contacts not only no show me they keep calling to tell me they will be there in another two hours, another hour, until finally I tell them I have to get out of the house before a dinner appointment. I call back Monday, frustrated, but they apologize, so I set up for a smaller window for yesterday and the same thing happens again, excuses this and that. I am frustrated that my generosity has cost me eight hours of time in my house waiting and three hours of work. I will have to give it to another organization because I just can't stand to have it sit in my garage for another week. I am loyal to my charities and it hurts me.
I went to the mall on Saturday, since I couldn't make it Friday waiting for the truck and I am assaulted by the waves of, "Support this...help do this...we could really use your..." I have no problem telling people no, but sometimes they look at you like your dirt. Yet while in a line at the food court I give the teenager in front of me some money to cover his lunch.
Mistress, Mo and I were enjoying dinner the other night and the doorbell rings. I answer the door and its some girl and her sponsor going door to door selling something for school. To me readers, this is the lowest of the low, public schools whoring out kids because the district can't be fiscally responsible, after a few seconds into her spiel I politely say, "No thank you have a good night,". I thought she might cry. The sponsor wasn't very happy either. But I wasn't happy and I didn't let them see that.
Yesterday I get a call on the home phone. CID says its CHASE. so I answer. The caller asks for someone who doesn't live at the number so I tell her, "I'm sorry that person doesn't live here." Then I get clicked. Clicked. No "Excuse me." No "Have a good day". I got hung up on. Thats not right. I know how hard it is to work a phone bank and how rejecting that experience can be which is why I am so nice to those people on the phone, firm but pleasant, and to just be hung up on when I didn't even need to answer the phone is just rude. It just confirms for me that Chase has not improved their customer service model since the last time I heard issues about them.
I'm telling ya, people get so wrapped around the axle at Christmas, I guess I am too. This is one of my most favorite holidays and each year it seems more situations arise that test my spirit. Who knows really why a church can't pick up my furniture. I could have told these guys that their boss is my personal friend and spiritual mentor but I didn't do that. I give a lot of my resources to my charitable organizations year round and to be treated or looked at with contempt because I don't support their specific cause right now is absurd.
I don't mind being asked to support charities or causes. Heck I do it all year long for those that have had unfortunate accidents, are unable to do things for themselves, suffered a terrible tragedy, need a hot meal. I heavily support specific organizations. I am just one small person compared to the generosity of the American public which is so amazing and blessing to the world.
I just don't see why asking for their generosity has to be done with the wrong spirit.
I believe in the spirit of giving. I truly believe that if you give you will receive back ten fold. I buy lunches for people, I buy gifts for people, I use unsolicited kindness. Just this month Mistress and I gave over 3,000 food items to a food drive. We sponsored an entire families Christmas with Christmas meals and gifts for their children and then bought gifts for another family's children. Not to mention all the other places our money goes to help others. We enjoy that and I feel a little embarrassed to mention it but it puts my rant in context.
In in my garage are several pieces of furniture Mistress replaced with the living room and family room furniture I bought her for Christmas. I called my pastor who runs the Dream Center and asked to donate it for one of the rooms. He gets his guy's to call me and they say it will be a week to get there so I take last Friday off work, then his contacts not only no show me they keep calling to tell me they will be there in another two hours, another hour, until finally I tell them I have to get out of the house before a dinner appointment. I call back Monday, frustrated, but they apologize, so I set up for a smaller window for yesterday and the same thing happens again, excuses this and that. I am frustrated that my generosity has cost me eight hours of time in my house waiting and three hours of work. I will have to give it to another organization because I just can't stand to have it sit in my garage for another week. I am loyal to my charities and it hurts me.
I went to the mall on Saturday, since I couldn't make it Friday waiting for the truck and I am assaulted by the waves of, "Support this...help do this...we could really use your..." I have no problem telling people no, but sometimes they look at you like your dirt. Yet while in a line at the food court I give the teenager in front of me some money to cover his lunch.
Mistress, Mo and I were enjoying dinner the other night and the doorbell rings. I answer the door and its some girl and her sponsor going door to door selling something for school. To me readers, this is the lowest of the low, public schools whoring out kids because the district can't be fiscally responsible, after a few seconds into her spiel I politely say, "No thank you have a good night,". I thought she might cry. The sponsor wasn't very happy either. But I wasn't happy and I didn't let them see that.
Yesterday I get a call on the home phone. CID says its CHASE. so I answer. The caller asks for someone who doesn't live at the number so I tell her, "I'm sorry that person doesn't live here." Then I get clicked. Clicked. No "Excuse me." No "Have a good day". I got hung up on. Thats not right. I know how hard it is to work a phone bank and how rejecting that experience can be which is why I am so nice to those people on the phone, firm but pleasant, and to just be hung up on when I didn't even need to answer the phone is just rude. It just confirms for me that Chase has not improved their customer service model since the last time I heard issues about them.
I'm telling ya, people get so wrapped around the axle at Christmas, I guess I am too. This is one of my most favorite holidays and each year it seems more situations arise that test my spirit. Who knows really why a church can't pick up my furniture. I could have told these guys that their boss is my personal friend and spiritual mentor but I didn't do that. I give a lot of my resources to my charitable organizations year round and to be treated or looked at with contempt because I don't support their specific cause right now is absurd.
I don't mind being asked to support charities or causes. Heck I do it all year long for those that have had unfortunate accidents, are unable to do things for themselves, suffered a terrible tragedy, need a hot meal. I heavily support specific organizations. I am just one small person compared to the generosity of the American public which is so amazing and blessing to the world.
I just don't see why asking for their generosity has to be done with the wrong spirit.
posted by Comm's @ 12:09 PM
11 comments
11 Comments:
I must respectfully disagree with your paragraph 5. I am sorry that this girl and her sponsor interuppted your dinner, however,most school districts ARE fiscally responsible. After serving on the PTA here and watching my mother teach and serve my home school district in excess of 20 years, and seeing the fiscal struggles that many schools go through, I don't consider children going door to door "whoring" themselves out. Teachers are underpaid to begin with and extracrarricular activities are an intregral part of the education experience. Buildings are expensive to build and maintain, and much of the fund raising done is for the "extra" part of the education experience. To take that away from the kids, in my opinion would do them a great disservice.
BTW. Thanks for all you've done for others this holiday season.
Its okay to disagree. In fact let me address this a bit deeper since this is a big subject. My mother was a Montessori teacher for many, many years. My good friend from my youth also my college roommate became a teacher. Our friend Wendy is a teacher. My godfather was a teacher then became a principal in the California school district until he retired. I have spent hundreds of hours talking to him about school issues.
I have a huge heart for teachers. I think what they do is completely selfless and amazing. They are paid very little to teach very big classrooms. They are often given old books and old aids and many times go out of pocket for things like photocopies and projects.
From my understanding of the CA school system, which is perhaps more progressive than others and how I view all public school systems are now or will go, is the disparaging costs between between what the teacher in the class room makes and what the administrators make. I think class room teachers with ten years experience should make more money than an administrator in a corporate office not teaching kids. I think there are too many administrators. Why does on person need two or three secretary's? Why does a district counselor make more than a classroom teacher or principle? It makes no sense.
Its not class room teachers who make kids sell door to door, its the districts managers who bloat their payrolls with too many assistants and can't fund basic programs like sports uniforms, dances or field trips.
Another issue with schools loosing funding is the No Child Left Behind Act. I support my President but don't agree with every decision he has made. NCLB and specifically the AIMS (standardized) test in this state, has hand cuffed teachers to not teach our kids but get them to pass a test. A tremendous amount of money and manpower is siphoned from front line teaching budgets to support the bloated state and district bureaucracy of studying for AIMS then retesting because most kids don't pass the first or second time they take it. I have heard stories of smart students who pass AIMS right away and then feel segregated because most teaching is geared to pass AIMS and not honor roll or pre-college courses.
In Arizona we actually have to debate whether illegal aliens should have instate tuitions, not to mention the funding that goes into bilingual education so that we can teach Spanish speaking kids in their native tongue while we teach them English to process them into regular classrooms. Arizona teachers routinely get a trashing because of the states high drop out rate, irregardless of the fact that a great majority of these kids are illegals or Hispanics who are jumping between Mexico and America based on their family situation.
For FY2006 we budgeted (minus congressional changes) 4 billion dollars for the department of defense. For education we budgeted 40 billion dollars. There is tremendous waste from the top down on education and the people who suffer most are the kids and then the teachers. We don't need more money for education we need better tools, in some cases better teacher, but less administrators.
Teachers are not the brunt of my ire. I have great respect for them. Nor really was this ten year old girl who knocked on my door. its not her fault she is being taught that instead of fiscal responsibility its okay to knock door to door for money because she can't go on a field trip to the science center or needs new sports uniforms because school super needed another receptionist or bigger office.
I hear the annoyance. It's very frustrating when people don't appreciate that people do contribute but don't contribute to everything. And it's hard to take when you know you've done your part. But you have truly lived the spirit of the season even if they can't.
i disagree with paragraph 10.
i've seen you in action, you are one of the most generous people i have ever met... and, i'm not talking just monetarily.
I have set charitable contributions each year, and then the wife and I wing a bunch of stuff. And you're right, others who aren't receiving any of your money want to belittle you. "Well, could you just swing $10/month. That's not a big amount." Maybe not, but on top of the other amounts, it grows awful fast.
But don't think you're out there alone. The entire United States is harassed every year because we "don't give enough." Of course, the US is the single largest provider of charity in the world, but most of it comes from the people. Those doing the critiquing only look at government spending.
Finally, I'll challenge AZ Ironman 2007's assertion. Compare just about any public school with just about any private school. Private schools, on average, do more with less. That is the whole argument behind vouchers. There are private schools out there that take the "worst" (those the public schools claim are hopeless) kids and teach them. And teach them well. Without massive federal, state and local funding. Most teachers are very disciplined and dedicated about what they do. Most school districts are simply another example of government doing something for 10 times the cost it should.
Re: the kid who came to school with a "sponsor"- that is NOT something public schools do. In fact if there are any fund raisers going on in school the students are given explicit instrctions to NOT go door to door but sell to family and relatives if you can. These kids who are going around selling "junk" are in our neighborhood too and I always give them a piece of my mind and tell them that someone right now (some adult!) is making money off of them! And if they want to earn $$ they need to wash a neighbor's car or walk their dog or baby sit or something! I nvere hear what "organization" is behind these scams, but it's just that. And kids are being subjected to dangerous situations because of it! I repeat IT IS NOT PUBLIC SCHOOLS who are doing this! Heck, Girl Scouts don't solicit door to door anymore...school districts certainly can't be held accountable (but would be) if something were to happen to a kid who was going door to door selling stuff.
And yes, I agree with you about NCLB! I see so much $$$ being spent on programs for children who are not even citizens of this country, and it's one reason I need to retire soon before I say something, or refuse to do something because of my belief system...and get fired!
(On another note, these same types of families are usually the recipients of free dinners, clothes, shoes, glasses, you name it...around the holidays. These same families have cable, DVD players, cell phones, the latest movies and X-box. I don't.) My kid comes first-along with her education. So I have NOT given anything in the last few years as I see where it ends up and who gets it...usually not who deserves to get it. And it's expected, and we are never thanked. I will stop ranting now as people don't like to read comments this long!
I've tried having people come and pick up items and I ran into the same problem. Now, I place items in my carport and hang a big sign that says "free stuff". It's usually gone within an hour.
Wow, you generated some strong feelings with this post, which, I believe is a good thing.
That said, I suppose most of us have had good and bad experiences with public schools and the teachers are at the center of these experiences.
I do think there is some merit to the argument that by and large, public school success is based on cheeks in the seats, as opposed to productivity, which is how we are measured in the private sector. For that reason, I do tend to believe that testing can be a good thing and a more accurate measurement of success rather than numbers of students, or even numbers of students who pass.
Concerning your comment about phone solicitors - I am less patient than in the past on these calls. I tend to wait until they take their first breath and then politely say no thank you and hang up. If I wait for a response to my no, then I will get a multitude of arguments, and my answer will still be no.
I have tried to marshall our charity contributions to a select few, with the thought that more funds and stuff to a few will make a bigger impact than a little to many charities. I also have been aiming my gifts more locally for personal reasons as well.
Concerning the looks and comments from those we choose not to give to, I try to remember Dale Carnegie's perspective in that he would not let another determine his personal perspective and outlook and attitude.
Merry Christmas to you and yours. You continue to strike me as a good human and one that many of us can learn from.
Comm - your heart is always in the right place. Your spirit IS generous. I heard this at church yesterday, and it made me feel better - our pastor said that lightness can and does have an impact on darkness, but that darkness cannot dim lightness. Light a candle and think about that. The light doesn't get dimmer when you walk into a darker room. Just keep letting your light shine.
;-)
About NCLB, I like it. If it "only teaches kids how to pass tests", then it's working - that's the point. If they can pass the test, then they know what they need to know. They won't pass the test if they don't know what they need to know. It's a tool that can help teachers know what they need to focus on.
Have you taken the standardized test in AZ? I took MN's online. Only 65% or so can pass it. The questions were:
1 - numerically express twenty-five million.
a. 25,000
b. 25,000,000
c. 2,500,000
d. 25,000,000,000
2 - Suzie took 5 math tests. Find her average score. Her test results were: 75, 85, 100, 93.
a. 88
b. 93
c. 66
d. 75
Comm - Only 65% can get a "D" or better. That's alarming!!!! NCLB will give us the "where are we now" figures and then we can teach the kids what they need to know. I say give NCLB a chance to find what the deficiencies are, then we can solve what I think is a huge, huge problem.
About public funding v. private funding. My kids' private school costs about $11,500 per child per year. Last I checked, our local elementary school spends about $20,000 per student per year. The figures are online for anyone that wants to see them. Yet my kids are learning things our local public school neighbor kids are not learning.
In fact, our babysitters that have attended public school leave me messages that say, "Bob called. he (sic) sed (sic) that hill (sic) be home at 6". Our sitter Kelly (9th grade) asked me to help her with her homework about a year ago. The question she was stumped on was, "How many inches are in 3 2/3 yards?" How do you get to 9th grade and not know that? Don't you want to know what is, exactly, that the kids are unable to pass?
I don't blame the teachers. I agree with you that there is an unspeakable amount of waste, and the money is not going to the teachers or the classrooms.
All the teachers I know have hearts of gold, and want to teach the students, but with 34 kids in a classroom, 10 of which are behaving like gangsters, it is nearly impossible. By springtime, after 9 months of mostly babysitting and controlling chaos, the teachers have no choice but to send the un-taught kids to the next grade. That's how Kelly is in 9th grade and can't figure out how many inches are in 3 2/3 yards, and thinks "said" is spelled "sed". Public schools do not have kids repeat grades even if they can't pass the evaluation tests. They just pass them to the next teacher who will in turn pass them to the next.
At our private school, kids repeat the grade if they don't know the material. And this is discovered when they cannot pass the test.
I say give NCLB a chance.
Merry Christmas, Comm, Mistress and little Mo. You guys rock. And for the people whose lives you are changing with your generosity, thank you!
Jenny
5 tests oops
make that 4 tests - -you know what I mean... ;-)
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