Since you asked...
"If you never attempt more than you know your capable of you will never achieve all that is possible."I had a whinny little candy assed post ready to go up this morning and I ditched it. Its not right. So what if I feel like a Big Fat Pig. So what if I procrastinated with my dry cleaning and wore workout pants, a company logo'd dri-fit and running shoes to work. Its an acceptable model of dress for trainers but not my personal standard. My stomach has been causing me problems this week, like I had never stopped ingesting dairy. See all whinny little candy assed stuff. There was more.
Me
The reason I ultimately didn't post it is that all these 'things', these piffles in life, are because they are inconsequential to my goal of Ironman. I have to have the moral courage to overcome this trivial crap and get on with my life.
Hell yes I am frustrated that I am dropping from the full to the half this weekend. I didn't get enough long distance time in December. Does it present my pysche with a chink in the Ironman armor. Absolutely.
But I am better than that. PF Chang's run is not my goal. My goal is bigger than a marathon. I have run marathons already.
I didn't post my original, now I am getting angry with myself, I didn't post that original bitching post because I am not here to demotivate all 3 people who read this blog. I am here to energize you, motivate you, inspire you to do more with your life. I want people to read my posts and feel that they should drop down and do ten push ups or lace up and go for a run. I don't want to bring people down. I want to lift people up, instill in them a spirit of triathlon. I want prospective triathletes and new comers to find strength in me, so they can find the strength in themselves.
Yeah there is going to be future posts that I relate depressing details about my son's health or other troubling or niggling aspects of my life, but those are not excuses for quitting my goals and eliciting sorrow from readers. One of my daily affirmations is,
"I bring my own weather with me."Meaning: I can't let someone else's problems bring me down. I have compassion, I have empathy, if I am asked I may offer guidance. But it sure as you-know-what, ain't going to bring me down or distract me from my destination. I have personal responsibilty to myself to solve and overcome my issues. Just like I expect others to do that to themselves. My goals are bigger than someone else's victimization or pity party. Conversely I am not going to bring that to my readers.
Please understand that I am not saying to you personally, you don't matter, you do, because you are a positive person if you come here to CMS. All of you do matter. I mean mostly those people we have around us that are downers. You know them, you know you do. I felt like a downer after reading my unpublished post.
Protect yourself from soul-suckers and dream killers, even if its yourself. Especially if its yourself. I felt like I did that in my unpublished post. I hope this makes up for it.
posted by Comm's @ 12:24 PM
8 comments
8 Comments:
I am glad you drop the full. This year i was planning to do another full. But i stop and realize that the main goal is Ironman. There is no need to pump my feet to injury doing full.
Downers...hmm...last night i stole a term from my fellowship...time burglars. That's what I call them. Ever since I start training this month, I am very careful of who I hang out with. Every min is precious, there is no need to be with ppl that just drains your energy.
Tomorrow is another day. Another day to train :)
Don't feel bad, Com. On the contrary, you have a bigger prize in mind and if this interferes with obtaining that prize then it's just not a smart thing to do. Maturity and patience are much better qualities than stubbornness (I have to constantly remind myself of that because it's not easy). Lots of us train day in and day out and true, it's inspiring to read posts of monster volume and intensity. But it's also nice to see that these same folks are human as well. It brings the "man" back into the "Iron".
If it makes you feel better, you've inspired me to be smarter about my season. :)
I wouldn't worry about the half. It is what it is. Just try to have the best time you can.
I like your daily affirmation! I believe that to be true. It is something that I am working on :)
i'm #7. we're with you.
OK, you're doing the Half. You're doing the smart thing. Go out there, work it, and ENJOY it!
so, it's only a half, you don't have anything to prove. we know what our 'A' race is -- we are locked and loaded as the target has been identified.
i hear you Comm. i have a saying too... it's canadian, because of the long winters:
'if you wanna catch a cold, hang around with someone who's got one'.
great post, comm. i personally think that a little whiny from time-to-time is okay.
A) it's therapeutic. you need an outlet sometimes, and the blog is a great way to do it. being able to express verbally what you're feeling is extremely cathartic. believe it or not, i don't swear as much in real life as i do on my blog. i hold it in so that i don't offend 3D people... most bloggers I have never met (besides you), so i don't worry if they see that alter ego side of me.
B) we out her in blogland reading your site (there are more than three of us!) need to know that you're human!!!! whiny and bitchy makes you real!
I love that! 'Bring your own weather with you.' Words to live by.
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